You might remember that presumptive Republican nominee, Donald Trump, mentioned that he’d love to have Sarah Palin in his cabinet. This weekend, Palin revealed that she had a specific job in mind: Energy Secretary. From MSNBC:
In a freewheeling and strangely self-defeating interview on Sunday, Sarah Palin rallied behind Republican presidential front-runner Donald Trump, promoting herself as Trump’s potential secretary of energy even as she pledged to abolish the department.
“I think a lot about the Department of Energy, because energy is my baby: oil and gas and minerals, those things that God has dumped on this part of the Earth for mankind’s use instead of us relying on unfriendly foreign nations,” she told CNN’s Jake Tapper in an interview that aired Sunday on “State of the Union.”
The GOP’s 2008 vice presidential nominee then took an unusual stance toward the department she positioned herself to lead: “I’d get rid of it. And I’d let the states start having more control over the lands that are within their boundaries and the people who are affected by the developments within their states. If I were in charge of that, it would be a short-term job.”
Okay, let’s play “spot the stupid.” I’ll get us started:
* God did not take a Divine Poop and “dump” minerals upon the Earth.
* Geology doesn’t give a crap about geopolitics.
* The agency she’s “thinking” about is actually called “The Department of the Interior.”
* Only Congress can “get rid” of the Department of Energy.
* The current Energy Secretary, Ernest Moniz, is literally a nuclear physicist. Replacing Moniz with Sarah Palin is like replacing your heart with a baked potato.
* “Mankind’s use” is not antithetical to “relying on unfriendly foreign nations.” She obviously meant to say that she thinks the God who poops coal specifically put natural resources in America so American-kind can be energy independent from Islamic countries, WHICH IS EVEN DUMBER THAN WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID.
* Why do Republicans who don’t think government can work want jobs in government? Who wants to be in charge of something just to watch it die? That’s what sociopaths do.
That’s what I’ve got. Please feel free to add your own. The one good thing about Sarah Palin being nominated as Energy Secretary would be that her confirmation hearings would turn into the funniest thing ever televised.
